Something New

I prayed so many years to find a husband. When I was single I used to wonder if God heard my prayers. I wanted to know when it was my turn to experience my taste of something old, something new, something borrowed, and something…red?

Now that I’m married I wonder what in the heck am I supposed to pray for?

I’m one of those people who worries about what’s next. The future.

A passage of Scripture that’s been kicking my butt lately is from Matthew 6. When I was single I used to hate Matthew 6:24. The one that says “No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money” (Matthew 6:24, NLT).

I struggled with finding one singular purpose because I wanted to do it all.

Have it all.

Be it all.

When God humbled me, and showed me my pride–I knew right then, I wanted to be devoted to God and only God.

Let me tell you, it was so much easier to transition into marriage with that attitude.

Then came the next verse!

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing” (Matthew 6:25, NLT)?

I find myself worrying about the stupidest things now. Petty things. I’m a newlywed, so there’s not much to complain about. It’s not that marriage is hard, but I’m still learning how to adjust.

Last week, I wrote my about my personality flaw in The Bulldog Principle. If there’s one thing marriage has taught me, it’s that my work ethic still doesn’t have anything to do with my worth–or purpose.

Here’s a new thing (not really). I am fulfilled in God. Although I want to please my husband or my publisher or even myself–I have my limits.

So today, I choose to embrace the newness.

The quietness.

The rest.

“This is what the Sovereign LORD, the Holy One of Israel, says: ‘Only in returning to me and resting in me will you be saved. In quietness and confidence is your strength. But you would have none of it” (Isaiah 30:15, NLT).

Thank you, Lord, for borrowed confidence!