• Faith,  Relationships

    Afraid of Marriage

    There are many reasons to be afraid of marriage. Thanks to Julia Roberts and Richard Gere, we will never forget the title of “Runaway Bride.” The movie follows Julia who freaks out in epic fashion and ditches the groom. Three different times she runs away from her wedding. Enter Richard Gere. He plays the journalist who covers her fourth wedding. There is something about his presence that forces Julia to reconcile her fear of marriage. Obviously the “Hollywood” ending is perfect, and they end up together–but it’s the process I found fascinating. So I have a question for you. What about marriage are you most afraid of? Recently, I received…

  • Relationships

    Can you talk about sex?

    If you’re a Christian, can you talk about sex while you’re dating or thinking about getting engaged? No, seriously I want to know. I wrote in Not Another Dating Book, “We dare to dream of the day when that guy or girl is going to walk into the room and change our lives forever. But what happens when he or she does? What if those feelings of unworthiness…don’t go away?” This time last year, Marc and I were getting pretty serious. I knew the long exciting road that was ahead of me. We would probably get engaged and soon. There would be ring shopping dates. Talks of buying a house.…

  • Relationships

    Can you Take a Risk?

    [Guest Post by Lore Ferguson] -The air in the car was solid, thick with humidity and silence. It was late and it was August. This conversation was going nowhere fast and everywhere slowly. Tangents kept us from landing on solid ground and fear was keeping us from saying everything swirling inside of us. What he wanted was for me to take a risk on him and what I wanted was for him to take a risk on anything. It was against this wall that we faced the end of the what had barely begun–without risk, no matter how small, we could not move forward. A friend tells me recently that he…

  • Relationships

    Fifty Shades of Virginity

    [Guest post by Arleen Spenceley] – In the twenty miles between my house and my office, there are at least six strip clubs. As I write this, ‘Magic Mike’ – a movie about a male stripper – has been in theaters a week and has grossed an estimated $63,322,000. Fifty Shades of Grey is novel about a woman who gives her virginity to a guy whose version of sex is violent and demeaning. It is now a New York Times bestseller. All this is to say I was not surprised that when my own grandmother learned that I am a virgin, her eyes were wide and her surprise obvious when she fumbled for the words: “You are?” It’s…

  • On Writing,  Relationships

    Pre Engagement Questions Series

    During the month of July I will be doing a series on Pre Engagement Questions before popping the question. I will be highlighting a few guest posts, book giveaways, and 5 key questions to ask before getting engaged. This time last year, Marc and I were thinking about getting engaged. We spent much time discussing these are six areas. We purposefully wanted to ask all our questions BEFORE we got engaged. Plus, after you get engaged–all you think about is planning a wedding. We heard how potentially stressful wedding planning could be. Instead of discussing important matters over designing invite cards at my parents house–we decided to intentionally talk about…

  • Relationships

    Becoming Approachable

    [Monthly Columnist – Rebekah Snyder] – Maybe beauty has nothing to do with it. Maybe instead of focusing on making ourselves beautiful, we need to focus on making ourselves approachable. I wonder if I’m the only person who thinks how ludicrous this is. Me. The girl of whom it was whispered around the youth group, “Don’t mess with Rebekah, man. Her dad will snipe you.” Me. The girl who spent five months avoiding two guys who would eventually become some of her best friends. Thankfully, they patiently pursued her until she finally agreed to attend their silly Christmas party – just to get them off her back. Yeah, I know…

  • Devotionals

    Same Sex Friendships

    I bet I wasn’t like you growing up. I was taught not to become friends with boys. Boys had kudies and could get you pregnant just by looking at you. Gross. I developed an unhealthy fear of boys at a very young age that stuck with me until college. Even then I was always cautious. To this day, I can still hear my parents yelling “10 inch rule! 10 inch rule!” Don’t lead him on. So I didn’t. Don’t let him get too close. So I didn’t. But when it came to girls, no rules applied. I could have late night phone conversations, sleep overs, and hang out pretty much…

  • Relationships

    A Woman Unashamed

    [Guest Post by Sarah P] – This is an emotional message, and I don’t like writing out of emotions. But since reading Friends With Girls, I’ve been eaten up. I didn’t want to spill my guts on your blog–and probably should be writing this to someone who actually knows me. But I just want to vent. I’m thirty-two. God started working on me in college, almost thirteen years ago now… I had pretty much rejected femininity. Saying I was uncomfortable in my skin was an understatement! Through the process I discovered that I had been sexually abused. With dear friends and mentors I worked through that, and began to let…

  • Devotionals,  Relationships

    True Friendship

    Sometimes the most holy and true act of friendship is to give up our rights. Everybody wants to be King David. Nobody wants to be Jonathan. David didn’t manipulate Jonathan for an easy way in or deceive him for the biggest seat in the house. Why? Jon was his friend. David endured shame, ran for his life, and stole scraps for food to survive. He never once took revenge on Saul or his friend Jon to become king. Everybody wants to be king. Nobody wants to suffer. Jon had it made. He was [already] royalty. He lived a life of luxury in the palace. Why did he give it all…

  • Faith,  Relationships

    Friends With Girls

    [Guest post by Andrea Marbach] – I know the feeling of being friends with girls and being left out in a conversation. The feeling of being less important and ignored. Being single is all I know. I have never been on a real date. Never been asked out for drinks. Never been kissed. I’m almost 25 years old. Growing up in a Christian household did not protect me from some really bad, life changing things that happened to me when I was a child. For many years, I struggled with self-confidence. At the age of 22, I was finally able to look at myself in the mirror and like what…