-
On Dating: Should Men Pursue Women First?
[Guest Post by Marc Fisher] – Recently, I heard a panel on dating & relationships that tackled many interesting questions–should men pursue women? It was extra special because my wife Renee was one of the panel speakers. I felt encouraged afterwards because it gave some real challenges to put into practice in my own life–but what stood out the most was a single question. A question asked often in Christian circles, but often merely glanced over, Should men pursue women–first? I think we miss something that can radically alter our relationships if we don’t stop to ponder this question in more depth. We need to ask why does the question…
-
Practicing Hospitality
During the past few months I’ve been practicing hospitality on my blog and in real life. First, I started with letting people share their stories. Then, I moved on to asking others to help me define the meaning of true friendship. Next, I asked others to write and answer pre engagement questions. Then I turned 30, and wanted to know if I was the only one who survived my 20s. After I lost weight, I released my latest series on why I love my body and asked others to share their stories too. Practicing hospitality means inviting, welcoming, and allowing two or more people to share with each other. Maybe…
-
Pre Engagement Questions
I want to thank every single person who wrote down pre engagement questions for Marc and before getting married. Thanks to my best friends, parents, and mentors for throwing me three separate Bridal Showers–I have notebooks full of encouragement, wise words, and tips. Here are 35 of my favorite pre engagement questions suggestions below: 1. Don’t Think…Enjoy! 2. All you need to know you can read in the Song of Solomon. 3. Remember, variety is the spice of life. Make each “encounter” a new adventure! 4. Tell him what you want and how you like it. He will appreciate you (get excited about) you sharing dirty details with him 🙂…
-
Can you talk about marriage?
[Guest Post by Emily Miller] – Our pastor asked my now-husband and I an important question at our first premarital counseling session. “When did you first start to talk about marriage?” And, we answered honestly, we really hadn’t talked about marriage in the two years we had dated until Joel gave me a ring. Not unless you count the time he asked, hypothetically and completely without context, how many kids I wanted to have someday. Or the time he asked, generally, what kind of “jewelry” I liked. Of course, we hadn’t talked about dating until after we had been friends more than a year and he snuck his hand across…
-
Sex and Money
[Guest Post by Jennifer Kephart] – I have heard it said that the two biggest things that married couples fight about are sex and money. I believe and know this to be true, and I think it is because so much of our identity and self-worth are wrapped up in these two areas of our lives. So many times when we meet someone new, we ask them, “what do you do?” Money can be such a touchy subject, but how then how are we just supposed to make it work? In my experience, I find that there are 3 primary areas where money issues can arise: 1) Not budgeting together…
-
Afraid of Marriage
There are many reasons to be afraid of marriage. Thanks to Julia Roberts and Richard Gere, we will never forget the title of “Runaway Bride.” The movie follows Julia who freaks out in epic fashion and ditches the groom. Three different times she runs away from her wedding. Enter Richard Gere. He plays the journalist who covers her fourth wedding. There is something about his presence that forces Julia to reconcile her fear of marriage. Obviously the “Hollywood” ending is perfect, and they end up together–but it’s the process I found fascinating. So I have a question for you. What about marriage are you most afraid of? Recently, I received…
-
Can you talk about sex?
If you’re a Christian, can you talk about sex while you’re dating or thinking about getting engaged? No, seriously I want to know. I wrote in Not Another Dating Book, “We dare to dream of the day when that guy or girl is going to walk into the room and change our lives forever. But what happens when he or she does? What if those feelings of unworthiness…don’t go away?” This time last year, Marc and I were getting pretty serious. I knew the long exciting road that was ahead of me. We would probably get engaged and soon. There would be ring shopping dates. Talks of buying a house.…
-
Can you Take a Risk?
[Guest Post by Lore Ferguson] -The air in the car was solid, thick with humidity and silence. It was late and it was August. This conversation was going nowhere fast and everywhere slowly. Tangents kept us from landing on solid ground and fear was keeping us from saying everything swirling inside of us. What he wanted was for me to take a risk on him and what I wanted was for him to take a risk on anything. It was against this wall that we faced the end of the what had barely begun–without risk, no matter how small, we could not move forward. A friend tells me recently that he…
-
Fifty Shades of Virginity
[Guest post by Arleen Spenceley] – In the twenty miles between my house and my office, there are at least six strip clubs. As I write this, ‘Magic Mike’ – a movie about a male stripper – has been in theaters a week and has grossed an estimated $63,322,000. Fifty Shades of Grey is novel about a woman who gives her virginity to a guy whose version of sex is violent and demeaning. It is now a New York Times bestseller. All this is to say I was not surprised that when my own grandmother learned that I am a virgin, her eyes were wide and her surprise obvious when she fumbled for the words: “You are?” It’s…
-
Pre Engagement Questions Series
During the month of July I will be doing a series on Pre Engagement Questions before popping the question. I will be highlighting a few guest posts, book giveaways, and 5 key questions to ask before getting engaged. This time last year, Marc and I were thinking about getting engaged. We spent much time discussing these are six areas. We purposefully wanted to ask all our questions BEFORE we got engaged. Plus, after you get engaged–all you think about is planning a wedding. We heard how potentially stressful wedding planning could be. Instead of discussing important matters over designing invite cards at my parents house–we decided to intentionally talk about…