• Relationships

    Why I don’t date men who are ‘willing’ to save sex for marriage

    [Guest post by Arleen Spenceley: If you’re an unmarried Diva, this article will give you some pretty hard to argue with advice. Arleen’s writing on chastity is not something you read everyday. Even if you are married like me, this is something we should pass on to our friends, daughters, nieces and granddaughters.] “There’s something I need to tell you,” I said to a man on his couch in a Tampa apartment. He — then in his late 20’s and interested in me — nodded, and waited for me to say it. I, then in my early 20’s, breathed in before I did: “I’m saving sex for marriage.” I breathed out while he…

  • Relationships

    Our Need For Intimacy

    [Guest Post by Priscilla Cash – When I got an email from a military wife, I had to say yes. Not just because I support our military, but because I know many military wives and moms who can relate. I hope you are encouraged by her vulnerability and courage to share about intimacy.] It was not just that I was a woman. It was not just that I had seen too many TV shows or read too many novels. Deep within, I knew I needed intimacy. It is a profound need. We crave it, we seek it, but it often alludes us. And so, as a teenager, I waited, feeling…

  • Faith,  Health & Body

    When it's Easier to Declare Defeat

    [Guest Post by Mara Rose – I am so encouraged by her story because someday if my husband and I decide to have kids I will have to go off my medications, and that will not be easy. I love what she says that God still performs medical miracles. Believe it! Be encouraged today my friends.] Sometimes it’s easier to declare defeat prior to trying, rather than to try and fail later. There are so many things that we can worry about in life. And our worries can be amplified when we decide to have children. This past summer, my husband and I decided that we felt ready to start a…

  • Relationships

    A Happy You Comes Before a Happy Wife

    [Guest Post by Arlene Pellicane – I just love the question she asks because so many women ask it before getting married. Now that I AM married, I can honestly say she speaks the truth! Don’t be afraid to wrestling with this question yourself, and be encouraged today!] Have you ever met someone who thought her happiness was dependent on getting married? I remember being in my twenties, dateless, without a speck of hope when it came to romance.  But I always believed that a happy me preceded a happy wife. In other words, if I couldn’t be happy alone, I couldn’t be happy with someone either.  I love the story…

  • Devotionals

    Walking the Plank

    Transition throws me for a loop every time – silly, of course. We all know that the only constant in life is change. But somehow my longing for comfort and control gets me to settle into a place with a deep, satisfying sigh. Close my eyes. Take a break from watchfulness. Then everything tips and I find myself rolling sideways, stumbling down a new ramp of transition. Looking for a new normal. Some transitions are instantaneous. In 2003 my husband collapsed on his favorite street in San Diego, Shelter Island Drive, just outside the bank. From that moment on, he never drove his truck, never wrote a check, dialed a…

  • Faith,  Relationships

    New eBook Loves Me Not

    I wrote a new eBook entitled Loves Me Not: Heartbreak & Healing God’s Way that released on Amazon and Barnes & Noble, and Smashwords on May 6th for only 2.99! If you’ve read Not Another Dating Book, you’ll notice I don’t talk about my story. That’s because it wasn’t until after I submitted my manuscript to Harvest House that I met my husband Marc. That’s why I’m excited to release my follow up with features including: + Why Guarding Your Heart Isn’t Enough + Can Men and Women Be “Just Friends”? + Desperate Singles + Breaking Up With “The One” + Why Changing Your Significant Other Won’t Work + The…

  • Faith,  Relationships

    Living Together Before Marriage

    [Guest Post by Ruth Rutherford] – Picture this, ladies: You’ve been dating an amazing guy for a while now and things are going perfectly. He is sweet, funny, smart and driven. When he looks at you, his eyes sparkle. When he smiles at you, your heart melts. And, most importantly, he really, truly loves God. You pinch yourself to make sure you’re not dreaming because (deep breath) you think you’ve found the one. You spend nearly every waking moment together, often falling asleep in one another’s arms while watching the latest Redbox release. Rustled awake by a nearby car alarm, you look at the clock near his couch and it…

  • Relationships

    On Dating: Should We Talk About Sex?

    [Guest Post by Lisa Velthouse] – Should we talk about sex? If so, when? And how? And what is OK to say, and what isn’t? And what, oh what, would our youth pastors think if they heard us now? Christians in a dating and marrying world are typically aware that the Bible’s teaching on sex reserves it for a married husband and wife. They are often also aware that the Bible celebrates married sex unabashedly. Song of Songs, anyone? As to the practical implications of all that, however, the clarity quickly fades into big questions and big confusion. But let’s get our grounding here, and begin by remembering that the…

  • Relationships

    Can you talk about sex?

    If you’re a Christian, can you talk about sex while you’re dating or thinking about getting engaged? No, seriously I want to know. I wrote in Not Another Dating Book, “We dare to dream of the day when that guy or girl is going to walk into the room and change our lives forever. But what happens when he or she does? What if those feelings of unworthiness…don’t go away?” This time last year, Marc and I were getting pretty serious. I knew the long exciting road that was ahead of me. We would probably get engaged and soon. There would be ring shopping dates. Talks of buying a house.…

  • Relationships

    Fifty Shades of Virginity

    [Guest post by Arleen Spenceley] – In the twenty miles between my house and my office, there are at least six strip clubs. As I write this, ‘Magic Mike’ – a movie about a male stripper – has been in theaters a week and has grossed an estimated $63,322,000. Fifty Shades of Grey is novel about a woman who gives her virginity to a guy whose version of sex is violent and demeaning. It is now a New York Times bestseller. All this is to say I was not surprised that when my own grandmother learned that I am a virgin, her eyes were wide and her surprise obvious when she fumbled for the words: “You are?” It’s…